Pitfalls in Married Life

Dr. Shanker Adawal (Jyotishaacharya, PHD, MBA)


MARRIAGE
The known proverb ‘handing and waving goes by destiny cannot be ignored. Here comes the role of Stars. Marriages are normally arranged marriages but there are ‘love’ marriage also and inter-caste marriages though in some cases persons changing their birth arranged marriages and love marriages. Parents of all-whether of the boy or of the girl, wish good marriages for their children, happy married life, acquisition of wealth and children, long life etc. but, on account of some reason or the other arranged marriages as well love marriages of not come out to be successful marriages do not come out to be successful married life i.e. the cases of divorce of love marriages break after sometime has been seen i.e. specially in those cases where the attraction had been temporary. You enter into love marriage or other association just on the basis of face value when you see somebody in a club/association/function etc. and get attracted.

Marriage is necessary for all but some persons just cannot marry and I attribute this to their birth stars. In marriage, what a person needs is a good partner having all qualities of compassion, kindness, affection and love feelings etc. and these characteristics differ from person to person. Actually these virtues make the married life a happy one. A man needs a gentle, beautiful, educated devoted wife to make the home ‘comfortable’.

PITFALLS IN MARRIED LIFE- WHY
There are various factors which have been found to be responsible for making the life of the couples as ‘miserable’. Apart from personal attitude and mental balance of the native, the following are the normal circumstances, when the married life fails and troubles come to the fore for some reason or the other.

              I.      Bad Mahurat for marriage – Mahurta is selection of an auspicious time for marriage. If the marriage takes place in an inauspicious moment, pitfalls in married life cannot be ruled out.

           II.      Non-combination i.e. non-matching of horoscopes also results in unhappiness in married life. Apart from other factors, we have ‘Raksha’ yonis and ‘Manushya’ yonis and this inter-se marriage may not do well.

         III.      Lack of promise in the chart. When there is no yoga for marriage for a person and still he is married, troubles cannot be ruled out.

        IV.      Celebration of marriage at a wrong time. In astrology, we have the human life of 120 years divided for various planets say Sun for 6 years, Moon for 10 years and Rahu for 18 years and so on. If the marriage takes place during the Dasha of inauspicious planets, it may prove successful unless the birth chart of other person neutralizes some of the defects. Untimely marriage.

           V.      Quarrel some nature of the wife or husband i.e. finding faults with each other.

        VI.      Wife or husband coming under the influence of other relatives/friends and parents. The cases of wife getting her husband killed, husband getting her wife killed are well known from personal experience and paper reports. Apart from mental imbalance, the hypnotism by Swami cannot be ruled out.

      VII.      Purposeful marriage to covet the worth of the other person either of the husband or of the wife. Some parents marry their daughters to a particular rich boy so that the properties get to their daughter in due course of time.

   VIII.      Husband or wife getting to social clubs/political parties/gambling etc. without the consent of each other. Late-arrivals of the husbands is not tolerated by some of the wives specially when they are house-wives specially when they are house-wives. I know a case of grocer who used to open his shop early at about 6.30 A.M to 7.00 A.M to sell the morning items of Bread, eggs etc. but after marriage, his wife persuaded him to open the shop at 9.00 A.M and he accepted.

        IX.      Behavior of the person – husband or wife is equally important. One may create for the other unwanted troubles by ‘irksome’ behavior which may  differ from person to person.

           X.      Dental of marital bliss-denying the sex on some excuse or the other.

        XI.      Career minded women may not pay the desired attention to the husband and his welfare.

      XII.      Concealment of vital facts from each other i.e. going somewhere else but telling a lie.

   XIII.      Indifference attitude towards the parents of the partner as well as their quests.

   XIV.      False accusation specially by the girl and her parents for demanding more dowry and lodging of false complaints to covet some property.

It may also be mentioned that the weak Moon in the 7th house of a horoscope is capable of giving depression and sickness and mental troubles from the spouse. On the other hand strong Moon in the 7th house can give happiness and prosperity and harmonious life. Mars in the 7th house can give troubles in married life and depending on its strength it can create circumstances for two wives. Be that as it may, such principles need to be applied by the astrologers carefully and well guided pronouncement’ need to be made by the astrologers to make the home happy and comfortable.

CONCLUSIONS:
Most of the pitfalls in married life can be avoided by adjustments, by following the advice of senior, by following proper astrological advice at the time of marriage. With regard to adjustment, I can say that husband may perform all duties including in the kitchen, in the other case, the wife had put a condition that she will not cook the food. Now, when no servant is there, the food comes from restaurant/hotel.

Little devotion to God proves very beneficial. Try to cultivate good habits (good sanskars) among the children and in my opinion they have to be kept from various T.V. scenes so that there is no deviation. God is one for all irrespective of the religions one is following – spare few minutes and remember him – the way you want.

In case of any defect including sexual incompetence need to be treated by the Doctor. Similarly, the cases of children should be settled amicably and leaving to the will of God. All these problems would differ from person to person.

Shanker Adawal
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